Good evening everyone, I hope you’re all doing well and enjoying your weekend. Some of you may be aware of a certain someone I’ve been dating these past couple of months, and well without making you want to throw up I’m really happy with him and he seems to be with me too.
So I guess this is my kind of formal post to say this is the guy who’s been making me insanely happy these past two months haha.
Last weekend was bank holiday, and thankfully I got to spend Sunday night and all day Monday with him. We looked around one of my favourite museums, The Imperial War, and then we pretty much stuffed our faces with the tastiest burger ever. I’m even proud enough to say that I didn’t make a complete mess of myself, but Sam nearly had to roll me out the door I was so stuffed.
I feel shy to write even more about him now that I know he’s been reading this blog, the cutie. I’m sure he’ll make more appearances in the future, as in fact Sam has written a review on Batman: The Dark knight Returns by Frank Miller which I will be posting tomorrow.
He’ll tease me for saying this but when Sam mentioned writing a review to go on my blog I was beaming, for this guy who I really like to take an interest in my hobby and wanting to give it a go himself? SUPER CUTE!
Anyway, no doubt you’ll hear more snippets about myself and Sam soon without me wanting to bore you all to death in this single post.
I’m very happy 🙂
I don’t really touch on these sort of topics and I’m certainly no expert on relationships so don’t take everything I say here as being the same for everyone, I merely want to share my own experiences on matters that might concern you also..
I’m currently in my first what I call ‘proper’ adult relationship, what I mean by this is that my relationships in the past haven’t led me to call somebody my boyfriend, and I put this down to where my insecurities have often gotten in the way. I don’t regret this at all, if anything I can honestly say I was ready for a relationship. I don’t believe it’s healthy to just throw yourself into a relationship where you’re not sure what you feel for another person, the worst that will happen is you hurting the other person’s feelings because you don’t actually want to be with them.
I’m 20 years old and I met my boyfriend Aaron online, immediately alarm bells are ringing in your head thinking *catfish*- nope I can safely say he’s real and we met up in London within a few weeks of knowing each other. Don’t get me wrong I was beyond nervous, I remember the day so well and despite it’s hiccups of me losing my train ticket and spilling a drink down me it was one of the best days of my life. Everything felt natural and I couldn’t stop smiling all day long and it didn’t occur to me that by the end of the day we would be going our separate ways, at this point we both knew that we wanted to see each other again.
This all sounds splendid and things but I’m not going to say it’s all been rosy, at times it’s been a struggle I can’t deny that. I remember a couple of months into our relationship we lost contact, there was a situation with his phone and us being stupid we didn’t think of having other methods of contact for each other- if you can learn anything from this make sure you can contact them in other ways except the phone! Originally I thought he had turned into a prick and ignoring my texts and calls were his way of dumping me and I felt angry, stupid, upset and just utterly heartbroken that he would do that. Anyhow, it was all resolved and it made us both realise how much we do care about each other.
With the distance of the relationship it’s not all bad, for one I can concentrate on my OU course without distractions, I’m not neglecting my other friends, and when we do see each other we make the most of it. If anything it feels extra special and I appreciate every second I spend with him, but I definitely ugly cry when we have to say goodbye. If I could be with him more than of course I certainly would, unfortunately we live two hours apart from each other and he’s full time at work and I only have my weekend job to pay for train tickets etc. We respect and understand each other’s situations but it’s a great comfort that we both know that one day we’ll be by each other’s side every day, and this is what keeps our relationship going. It’s the faith that we’re going to make this work to the best to our advantage, if this were to be turned over then I guess the relationship would go downhill.
What I sometimes struggle with our relationship isn’t just the missing of his comfort by how others react around me. My boyfriend is five years older than me and I guess some people don’t approve or whatever, and I know I shouldn’t take it to heart but when it’s those you care about then its certainly does have an effect at times. I am however blessed with a family that are understanding, they just worry at times which I can understand. It doesn’t bother us in the slightest, it’s actually quite a nice age gape because he’s more mature than guys my own age, and it’s quite a relief to have someone of more experience too.
After a couple of months of not being able to see each other, on the 26th I’m going to visit him and I’m so so excited!
Now that you’re all pretty up-to-date with things, I want to share a bit of wisdom with you all on how I feel that you can maintain a healthy and happy long distance relationship.
My tips I would give you are:
Communicate with each other– this is essential, make sure you send good morning and goodnight texts, even if they haven’t replied I’m sure there’s a perfectly good reason. Girls, he doesn’t always need to make the first move- you can too!!
Don’t jump to conclusions– they haven’t contacted you all day, there could be a number of reasons as to why this is. Don’t over think everything, just distract yourself with something else and if worst comes to worse they don’t reply, just send them one last text saying you hope they’re okay and to contact you when they can to let you know they’re alright.
Think positive– rough patches are inevitable with any relationship, if you want it to work out you need to believe it to work! A couple of times I’ve felt a bit deflated when we’ve both been busy and haven’t spoken as much as we’d like to, it’s not either of our faults but the point is to not let this make you doubt your relationship.
Having doubts– either they’re having doubts or you are, again communicate that to one another. If something is bothering you the best solution is to tell them! They can put your mind at rest by them telling you how they feel, either outcome at least you know where you stand.
Give them space- I am the worst for this- being insecure with not only yourself but your relationships with other people can be a killer. If something doesn’t seem right I can suddenly become very rational and send messages crying out for reassurance. Just try to remember that they have other priorities than you where they may be stressed with work and other matters, and they just need time to sort themselves out. If they’re not so talkative that day just reassure them that you’re there if they need to talk and just back away and wait for them to come to you- that way they won’t feel so claustrophobic.
Try and see each other when you can- this is the longest time I haven’t seen my boyfriend for, it’s not as easy meeting up when you live some distance apart. However, making plans to see each other or day trips/stay over’s are the best and give you something to look forward to!
Live your own life- I think this is probably the most important one to remember. Just because you’re in a relationship, it doesn’t mean the rest of your life goes on hold and that person is the centre of your universe. Nope, you still have things to do for yourself; work, studying, socialising with friends and family etc. Your partner wouldn’t want you to miss out on these things for them, and the same I’m sure goes for you with them too. I’ve just come back from a trip to Prague and me and Aaron didn’t have a phone call or anything, we simply sent good morning and goodnight texts. It gave us both some space, and despite me missing him an awful lot it was a nice getaway with my parents.
Like I said previously I’m no expert on relationships, but from what I’m learning these are the important things to remember. I always try to think: if he’s with me then there’s nothing to worry about, and if something was wrong then he would break up with me. Just keep doing what makes you happy as that’s the most important thing, and if the relationship is worth it then everything will work out- just have faith.
Hugs and long distance love,
Recently I’ve been thinking about what really matters in life, I think every one of us gets caught up in silly things that don’t necessarily matter as much as what other things do in our lives. I’m not saying trying to get a tweet off your favourite actor/musician/tv personality star isn’t important because to you it is (and also because I know what its like when you actually receive a reply ah!). I’m just stating that for the majority of us other things tend to be far more important. Family for instance, so today I’m going to be blabbing on about who this lovely man with me in the photograph is and what he means to me.
Obviously the picture above is dated but I’m fine with that. As you’re aware from the title, this man holding me is my Grandad (my Mum’s Dad).
This blog entry won’t be enough to express how much I admire and love my Grandad, to me other than my Dad he is the greatest man I will ever know- I know that for a fact.
I don’t know everything about my Grandad obviously, but what I do know is that he was in the RAF (Royal Air Force) and after several years of service he then worked for a company that made cables (sounds boring I guess but hey ho) and at the age of 65 he retired.
On birthdays he tends to receive different presents such as flying a small aircraft and going up in hot air balloons, he’s very much the adventurous type in that he’ll most likely try anything once. A distinct memory in my head was the time as a family we spent the weekend at Butlins holiday park, we went swimming and they had this mushroom ride where you went down a slide and at the end you drop into a bowl and spin around until you eventually fall out the bottom and plunge into deep water. Now for starters, I didn’t dare go on it because I was petrified of drowning- that sounds so dramatic but knowing me I probably would! You can probably guess, the next minute I see my Grandad drop out the bottom. I was speechless and yet at the same time I was impressed, just amazing considering he’s 75!
Which brings me onto the fact he keeps himself fit, he has his own allotment and occasionally he goes to bowls with his friends.
I’m rambling a bit too much now, but I love all the little things he does it makes me smile a lot. He has us 11 grandchildren and like any grandparent he calls us all by our different names until he finally gets the right one, bless him!
He’s my ultimate hero, whenever I’ve lost confidence in myself with my education he’s always given me that confidence back. He gives such support in wishing me good luck with exams and just inquiring after me, just them little things that mean the most. I visit him regularly on a Saturday afternoon after I’ve finished work and he gives me the biggest hug and kiss I could wish for. I remember being a little girl and he’d answer the door to me and he’d lift me up off the ground and give me a huge hug tickling me with his beard- always made me laugh. He’s one of those people that would do anything for you. He’s been doing up my Auntie’s house for a few years now and boy does it look amazing, the transformation of it all is just astounding! One afternoon I said to my mum “I hope Grandad’s around to do up my house when I move out” and she laughed, and slightly embarrassingly told my Grandad what I had said. He responded with “If I’m still around I would be more than happy to do it”, can you believe that haha, I mean its not likely to happen but seriously what an amazing man he is. I couldn’t ask for a better grandparent, he is just priceless!
What I’m getting at is that its the people closest to us that mean the most, at times they may get on your nerves but they love you. That’s never going to change, I cherish every moment I spend with my Grandad as we all know unfortunately they can’t stay with us forever if only it were possible.
So my message for you guys today is to go and spend time with your loved one’s and cherish every moment you have with them.
As always thank you for reading!